"In his irreverent 1906 masterpiece, The Devil’s Dictionary, American writer Ambrose Bierce took aim at all manner of human hypocrisies, sins and shortcomings by penning a lexicon of cynical word definitions for a cynical age."
In the spirit of Bierce, Ozy takes a look on Valentine's Day.
“Be Mine” n. Overly possessive courtship proposition that has become a holiday staple, presumably because neither “You Belong to Me” nor “I Shall Have You” would fit on a half-inch piece of heart candy.
flowers, n. Collection of a plant’s reproductive organs harvested and offered up to the female of the species by a male who has no feathers or ornamentation of his own with which to attract a suitable mate.
lingerie, n. Impractical undergarment modeled by Tens and sold by Eights to Threes hoping to make their Fours look like Sixes.
love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage. —Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary
wedding, n. A funeral where you smell your own flowers. —Eddie Cantor
